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Here's good news for inmates everywhere. Crying will get you out of jail.
Just ask Paris Hilton. According to TMZ, Hilton was released from jail today after serving only three - count 'em - three days in the clink. The hotel heiress/socialite had reportedly been crying constantly and unable to sleep. As of yesterday, her lawyer and a shrink had been her only reported visitors.
No official confirmation yet but the site reports that the deal was sealed yesterday and Paris, who had originally been sentenced to serve 45 days, which were then hacked down to 23, got out of jail early this morning. And just in time! One more day and her spray tan would have faded, her manicure might have chipped, her extensions might get tangled or she could have broken her teeth on the bars, which Sarah Silverman was concerned about on Sunday night's MTV Movie Awards.
Thank God the authorities allowed this fragile flower to go home to her 100% Egyptian cotton sheets. Justice has been served, the media had a field day and I know Paris has learned an important lesson from this experience, which is "I really am better than everyone else and I do deserve special treatment."
And crying works! Who knew?
UPDATE: Paris has been reassigned to "Home Arrest" for 40 days. Yeah, that'll work. Sound more like "House Party" to me. And she'll probably make ankle bracelets a must-have fashion trend.
Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic
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I think it's time we had to face the fact that there is two systems of justice in this country: one for the rich, and one for the rest of us. Starting with the Supreme Court which decided our presidential election for us negating the popular vote, and working all the way down to Paris Hilton. Yes indeed, the rich ARE different from you and me. This is their country, not ours. Live with it or do something about it.
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I live in Italy. Whereas I understand that a minor crime should not be handled as a major one, I can't understand honestly why Paris Hilton, whose main virtue in life is that of being born ultrarich and untravapid, cannot serve her minor sentence.
But that'a not her fault: the fault if of those tons of admirers that keep admiring this woman who is not able even to wear a dress that doesn't cost as much as one of her admirer would earn in 2 years, without crying. Her admirers and fans startle me more than her and the way justice was handled. It is her fans who made of this mrs nobody a celebrity.
Posted by: Alberto | June 08, 2007 at 12:54 AM
call her a bitch, spoiled brat, a real blonde bimbo, a phony f**k, a spiny broad , a floozy and a loose canon she's all of these and more. but don't call her stupid it worked the dumb ones are still in jail. i wish i would of thought about doing the same thing that is crying, stomping my feet , pouting, pulling my hair, bed wetting and what ever else she thought of. maybe i wouldn't of spent the night in jail for my dui. difference is i couldn't and wouln't lower myself. hilton has no class she's the horse's ass.
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